WOE AND SYMBOLISM. (theopteryx) wrote in thegaystarfish,


HELLO hello hello! So two weeks ago in the final chapter of thegaystarfish there was a very unsubtle (we don't do subtle here! no room for subtle!) hint to go check out another livejournal community. It wasn't actually an offshoot or sequel, but a secret contest, and I am here to announce the winners!

Each entrant had to:
1) add 'the sexually ambiguous seacucumber' to their LJ interests for the duration of the contest
2) either make a macro out of or reword a comic panel OR write a short drabble about the gay starfish's past
3) Take a picture of the gay starfish in a scene from daily life


IN THIRD PLACE, WINNER OF THE BRIAN THE NARWHAL STATUE: clandie_kid, for working in both how BAD ROMANCE IS TOTALLY FRANK'S JAM, HOW DID YOU KNOW, and also The Crow because yes, yes the gay starfish would definitely try. He likes 'em mysterious.



IN SECOND PLACE, WINNER OF THE HAND-KNITTED MOOP MOOP DOLL: strobelighted, for making me L O L and also get the Fresh Prince theme song stuff in my head (and also making terrible puns, I love terrible puns, no one is surprised).

The drabble:
A rap, by the Gay Starfish:

Now here's the story all about me,
Your favorite starfish that lives in the sea.
It's not about how I am king of the phallus,
But rather how I came to live in the Bubble Palace.

By the shore of the Black Sea born and raised
On the beachfront where I spent most of my days,
Swimming out, tanning, clinging all cool
And checking out some hotties outside of the pool,
When a couple of sharks, they were up to no good,
Starting making trouble in my neighborhood.
I got in one little fight and Mama Plankton got scared
And said, "You're moving with Boy Princess Gerard in the Bubble Palace."

I waited for a current and when it came by
The fish in it were see-through and the plankton were fly.
If anything I could say that the current was foulest
But I thought, man, whatever, I'm gonna be in a palace!

I floated up to the bubbles about seven or eight
And I yelled to the others, "Y'all jealous. Don't hate."
I thought to my myself, "My fame is eternal"
And so I became the gay starfish of LiveJournal.

and picture:


caption: Guess who just got laid? Hint: it's me. >:D

Aaaaaaaaaaaaand finally, the grrrrand prize winner of both these super amazing Gerard and Frank statues AND an inked/watercolored drawing of any of the Moopverse characters OF your choice, is: candidlily, for an A+ drabble that really made me laugh, clever inclusion of the Moop shirt, and actually sticking the gay starfish to your boob and posting it to the internet. You make us all proud.

"So of course I wanted to end on a high note, right? And I'd saved my best one for last, so I look right into the crowd and say, 'A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.' Right? Comedy gold! And I got nothing but crickets. So my best buddy, he says to me, 'Ralph,--'"

"Wait," Frank interrupts, ignoring Gerard's little whine of protest as Frank ceases to pay careful attention to that spot on his neck. "Your name is Ralph?!"

The starfish narrows his eyes. "I'm trying to tell you about my stand-up career right now."

"You're just telling puns," Gerard grumbles, crossing his arms and pouting when Frank doesn't pay attention to him. "Nobody likes puns."

The starfish goes into a rant about the integrity of puns, okay? but Frank just stares in amazement. "Does nobody else care that his name is Ralph?"

A cluster of 200 or so starfish pop out from under the bed suddenly, shouting things like 'Daddy Ralph!' and 'I care!' The starfish screams and jumps out of the window, his children following diligently.

Gerard stares after them in shock, and Frank smirks. "Knew I could get rid of them somehow."


You can check out all of the contest entrants here, and you should, because they are all AMAZING. Winners, if you could please comment here with an email address so I can contact you to get your shipping address for your prizes, that would be awesome! And since I had SUCH a hard time picking winners for this one, everybody who entered the contest gets a free doodle snail mailed to them of the character of their choice. Comment here with your email too! :)

Thanks guys! You are wonderful. ♥
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